The Praying Wife Behind the Pastor's Fruitful Ministry: Remembering Kay Smith

Story by Christmas Beeler

Kay Smith, beloved wife of Calvary Chapel founder Pastor Chuck Smith, passed away peacefully at her home on August 13, 2021, preceded by Chuck in 2013.

Shortly after her death, Calvary Chapel Magazine chronicled the memories of Kay from numerous pastors’ wives who had worked closely with her. They fondly shared examples of her powerful and loving way of ministering to others. In this installment from that story, published in print Issue 89 (Fall 2021), Gail Mays and Jean McClure remember precious times with Kay.

Gail Mays

Gail Mays teaches at a conference. The wife of late CC Pastor Steve Mays, she served on the first board of young pastors’ wives in the early days of the Calvary Chapel movement. She shared that Kay had the ability to see and encourage the women in their spiritual gifts: “I was an introvert, but she recognized the gift of teaching in me and encouraged that. I’ve learned to do the same thing in my ministry."

Serving God Together

The initial board of young pastors’ wives included Sharon Ries, Gail Mays, Jean McClure, Sandy MacIntosh, Karyn Johnson, and June Hesterly. Gail, wife of late CC Pastor Steve Mays, recounted the first time the young pastors’ wives gathered with Kay in The Bride’s Room at CC Costa Mesa—a space Kay used as an office when there were no weddings—to seek the Lord together. “At first we sat on the floor,” Gail recalled with a chuckle, “and Kay asked, ‘Are you going to make me sit at this table all by myself?’ We were so intimidated; she was this pillar of faith … and we felt like we were the least of the least.”

She reflected, “But Chuck and Kay had this ability to see the potential in someone, to encourage us in our spiritual gifts—administration, teaching, counseling. I was an introvert, but she recognized the gift of teaching in me and encouraged that. I’ve learned to do the same thing in my ministry.”

Also, Gail recalled, “Kay taught us to bathe everything in prayer. She was a prayer warrior.” Intercessory prayer was an important part of the Calvary Chapel movement, Gail related: “As the Calvary Chapel churches were growing, issues would come up, or a burden that a pastor’s wife was carrying, and we would bring it before the Lord together in prayer. Often, He would answer or show us what to do by the time the meeting was over.” Those prayer times became powerful sessions of interceding for the pastors’ wives, their husbands, families, and the growing family of Calvary Chapel churches worldwide.

Fifty years ago, Gail accepted Christ at Bariah House, one of the Christian homes that Calvary Chapel sponsored for the newly converted young people. The young men and women slept in separate rooms, had group Bible studies, shared the chores, and listened to Chuck teaching on cassette tape. The girls would pile into vans to attend Kay’s Bible studies on Friday mornings.

“It was like our Bible college,” Gail recalled. “We were truly a family of brothers and sisters. The blood of Jesus restored our innocence, which was so healing.” Soon she married Steve, and the two of them served as leaders over the house ministries for eight years, helping other young people find freedom in Christ.

Jean McClure

Jean McClure, wife of CC Pastor Don McClure, shares remembrances of Kay at her memorial service. “Kay told us to start a prayer group in our churches, to find godly women who want to pray,” Jean revealed. “She was filled with the Holy Spirit, and she was a wonderful example to all of us.”

A Gift from God

Jean McClure, wife of Pastor Don McClure, recalled that Kay prayed for their 18-month-old son Michael when he began hemorrhaging internally. After that, Kay often prayed for Michael, who is now pastor of Calvary Christian Fellowship of San Jose, CA. Pastor Mike has been fined $3.8 million for holding church services during the COVID-19 pandemic in the state of California.

Jean related, “Today I was thinking about all that Michael has gone through in the past year, and I believe her prayers have helped him rise to the occasion and be able to stand firm.”

Jean testified, “His church has quadrupled in size, and he’s baptizing 40-50 people every couple of months.” This reminded her of the early years of CC Costa Mesa when God sparked a revival among the hippies, which many believe was ignited in part by Kay’s ladies’ prayer group. “Kay told us to start a prayer group in our churches, to find godly women who want to pray,” Jean revealed. “She was filled with the Holy Spirit, and she was a wonderful example to all of us.”

A stay-at-home mother of four, Kay didn’t start teaching women until about 1970. The newly saved flower children needed instruction from a godly woman like Kay. Jean asked Kay to teach all the young women at CC Costa Mesa. At first Kay was unsure since her daughter Cheryl was still in junior high. Jean shared, “I prayed, Lord, just tell her she has to do this because we really want to know what she knows. I had other godly women in my life, but I wanted to know what she knew as a pastor’s wife.” In Jean’s home, more than 30 ladies would sit on the floor, couches, and chairs to hear Kay teach.

A family photo of Pastor Chuck, Kay, and their four growing children. Family relationships were always important to them, and Kay was a stay-at-home mother who often prayed for the families of CC pastors and their wives, including the McClures, Jean said. She added that Kay didn’t start teaching women until 1970, after Jean asked her to teach the newly saved flower children. In Jean’s home, more than 30 ladies would sit on the floor, couches, and chairs to hear Kay instruct and minister to them.

“She always told us the three most important things: Love the Lord with all of your heart (nothing else would work if you didn’t); love our husbands and children; and love God’s people,” Jean recounted. “She taught us to get into God’s Word every day. She warned us about staying away from worldly things, worthless TV shows; she taught us from the Word how to be godly wives and moms. When we applied these things, it changed our lives.”

Kay felt women’s ministry was essential for a healthy church. “She used to say, ‘If you don’t have something for your women, they will go some other place to get it. We have to meet with the women, together.’ I love that, in Calvary Chapel, women minister to women.”

Fulfill my joy by being like-minded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind. … Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. Philippians 2:2, 4

Although she ministered to hundreds of women, Kay would often reach out individually. “When she was burdened for you, she’d call or send a note,” Jean reflected. “I felt loved by her. One of my boys was being a real rascal in junior high, and she wrote me a note, telling me about raising her own kids, and it really comforted me. She said that no one is perfect, and that there are stages to motherhood. She encouraged but didn’t criticize; she showed love and compassion.” Many of the ladies would go to Kay directly. “If we were hurting, she would walk us through it, give advice, and pray with us.”

Therefore comfort each other and edify one another, just as you also are doing.
1 Thessalonians 5:11

Having a deep respect for God’s Word, Kay admonished the women “to be of sound speech. If you are teaching, you must be careful with what you say because you represent Jesus Christ. Don’t use slang or share inappropriate stories or try to be cute. Don’t do anything that Jesus died for.” Jean added, “She taught us to love each other. She really was God’s gift to us.”

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Listen to Kay Smith’s teachings on pastorchuck.org: Joyful Life and Pleasing God or read her books, Pleasing God and The Privilege.

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Sponsor Message: Calvary Bible Institute is a one-year program designed to equip those who are called to serve the Lord in full-time ministry. Visit CBI's website to learn more about their programs at calvarybi.com

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© 2023 Calvary Chapel Magazine (CCM). All rights reserved. Articles or photographs may not be reproduced without the written permission of CCM. All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc.® Used by permission.

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The Impact of a Pastor's Wife: Remembering Kay Smith